This one really touched me, I remember speaking to you in the past about your family so i could see how that could be very hard on you especially as you’ve transitioned throughout your life. In my own past i’ve dealt with self-mutilation which i’ve battled successfully over the years partly due to my own awakening experience. My fiance has also dealt with depression most of his life and attempted suicide. We both are doing sooo much better now, it’s taken a lot of reflection and mind exploration to get here. So i can certainly relate to where you are coming from… It’s a dark place to be but what i see here is you give yourself to others but forget to give to yourself. Self-care is immensely important. Being a mother and also running a Q&A blog has taught me you can only give so much but you have to give to yourself otherwise you will run yourself into the ground completely neglecting your health, your well-being, your hygiene, etc. Sometimes you earn that bubble bath believe me 🙂
In my experience, The number 1 problem with depression is lack of self-love. This is the huge one. The 2nd problem is lack of self control and self-pity/playing the victim. When we play the victim we’re putting everyone’s accountability about our circumstances on everyone except ourselves. When we aren’t taking accountability for our actions we suffer placing the blame on those around us. We say things such as ‘my parents did this to me therefore i am like this’ when in reality it’s all about your CHOICE. It’s a solar plexus issue. The 3rd problem is inability to relate to others via egoism. The 4th is feeling you are the only person in the universe via depersonalization/dissociation. Nothing is real therefore no one exists except myself which is farthest from the truth. The 5th which ties into number 1 lack of love for others. Granted everyone can experience depression in different ways these are usually the main causes behind it.
I personally believe pharmaceuticals are merely band-aids they help control the symptoms but they don’t cure the source of the problem. Therefore you can take all the pills you want and it will help, However it wont cure the entire illness. Therefore i’ll recommend a few things that can dramatically help you.
- LOVE YOURSELF – I cannot cannot stress this enough, it is hard sometimes, but you have to appreciate yourself, because if you can’t touch your own heart, how are you supposed to touch other people? You have to love yourself otherwise the entire world is out to get you, your vibrations are low meaning your thoughts are low your feelings are low, you are numb and empty. Appreciate yourself, what are you good at, what makes you happy, what do you do for fun, what do you like about yourself, appreciate your body, your soul, your mind, If you can’t open the heart chakra, your energy will suffer for it. The heart is the bridge connecting us to both worlds, both physical and spiritual. It is the key to personal happiness and healthy relationships <3
- CONNECT – Connect with people, if you are spiritual find a fb group if there’s no one local, connect with friends, with family, tell them your hopes and dreams, feel people with your heart, listen, Connecting with someone makes even a bad day a little better. it’s all about connection, when we don’t connect we are caught within our own thoughts and feeling in a cyclic pattern of recycling emotions. It’s blackhole energy. don’t get stuck in your own blackhole 😉
- RELEASE – Let go. The only person holding you back is YOU. You have the power and the strength, depression is only a state of mind, there are thousands of others to choose from, choose happiness choose peace. If this has something to do with the past. let it go. release it. visualizing yourself letting it go down the drain all your worries, all your anxieties, all your fears, just let it go. If we don’t release what doesn’t serve us it creates energy blockages and these blockages can transform into illness, bad health and mental illness. You have to release this. Try a Banishing Spell. Write what you don’t want to have anymore write every thought and feeling that is causing this depression, then burn it and let it go into the wind. I personally find writing to be a catharsis, Release these energies creatively if you don’t feel like burning something. Find some form of release and this will free you.
- CHAKRAS – And one of the most important things i personally believe will help ANYONE is learning about your own energy body. Research into it, you will blow your own mind with what your symptoms are and how it correlates to the solar plexus, heart chakra and third eye. I don’t know your own story but through my experiences i do know what depression does to the soul, you need to find your light again. Through Forgiveness, inner strength, releasing and Letting go of this.
The main chakras it affects are the Solar Plexus which deals directly with our happiness and moods, our will power, how we direct our will of action into the world, how we personally see ourselves, the maturation of the ego/Identity. Our Anger and our control of our lives.
Third eye and crown are also directly related to depression because Depression correlates to our Belief system. The Crown is about our faith, our spirituality, our belief not just in the universe but also in ourselves, our god essence. The Third eye is our inner sight of our mind’s eye, when these are unstable we can find it hard to properly listen to our intuition because there is something you are not seeing, something is being blocked…Realistically Depression on the chakras is very powerful because depression is linked to our emotional body when our emotional body is out of balance, our electromagnetic frequency can go off kilter causing a lot of issues. This is probably why it is hard to sleep as well, your body needs proper rest. When we don’t get enough sleep we can actually potentiate our ego because lack of rest can lower our cognitive function and understanding. Sleep deprivation isn’t pretty, it makes even our closest friend turn into our enemy.
I really hope this helps you find peace again
I send love and healing light to you through this hard time <3