is overthinking everything and feeling so depressed for no reason all part of the ascension? like i honestly feel so confused and my sexuality has been so off lately, i know im straight but my mind plays tricks on me and causes me to overthink it and doubt myself. its like i forget who i am.. i cant seem to control my negative thoughts and it gives me anxiety attacks. it makes me wonder if i will ever get past this.
Well when you overthink, you over analyze and when you over analyze you accidentally propel your mind into it’s own cataclysms of past and future illusion of fears, anxieties, worry, doubt which all stops prana from flowing correctly. When you over think you’re thinking in ego but you don’t realize you’re thinking in ego because unconsciously your mind just slips out of alignment. This usually happens when the ego is losing it’s grip which is happening more and more lately because we’re going through a point of transcendence.
One thing i’ll never forget what i took mda was that i saw all the illusions like they were a film role flashing my life back at me. we create our own fears by our thoughts and this is how i can prove it to you, watch your thoughts. Seriously WATCH them, observe them try to be the outsider of your own mind and see what happens. Eckhart Tolle is a genius behind this technique i highly suggest his lectures and lovely books. what will happen after you start observing your thoughts, you will see the flux of your emotions and ohy my god it works every time, EVERY TIME. it’s unreal.
When you think in past, your thoughts will circulate into a black hole of depression, regret, turmoil, utter sadness, grief, resentment, etc.
When you think in future, your thoughts are moving so fast you can’t catch up with them, they will feel like worry, doubt, deep deep fear, anxiety, TONS of anxiety, i’ll never be successful, i’ll never make it in the world, i’ll never have enough money, i’m afraid of losing him/her, omg so and so is cheating on me, what if i lose my job, what if that person really is using me, what if, what if, what if…
Now okay…what happens is you basically throw yourself off of alignment and unground yourself throwing yourself into your own karmic cycle of fear based thought patterns that circulate like a blackhole until you come back to present and release them. I’m telling you this because i did the same thing, we all do it, humanity does it ALL the time and is fueled by their thoughts. I see it happen daily, with my parents, with my friends, with my boyfriend, i’m a firm observer and the problem with this world is TIME. we’re so consumed with this idea of time that it takes over our lives.
I’m going to bet so much when you have these thoughts of confusion you are thinking in past and then it propels you into anxieties of future. i get it. we all do it. but the beautiful thing is we also can change it, by observing our thoughts. when this happens again and you feel this anxiety, just stop thinking, stop completely. and just breathe, say to yourself “i am not my thoughts” as a mantra, just continue doing that until you bring yourself back into the present.
It is only through facing ourselves, facing our fears, and surrendering into ourselves that we travel the darkness to find the lightness of our own being.
Also the sexuality thing has to do with our brain rewiring, it’s about balancing the masculine and feminine energy within our consciousness. So the sexual dreams and strange fantasies are really quite normal because everyone is innately bisexual but this is moreso a consciousness thing, rather than a sexual identity crisis. The problem is our society makes everything into polarity, gender, religion, orientation, etc. but we really need to see we are all one and the same, maybe in a past life you were male instead of female or female instead of male, do you get what i mean? This isn’t about being one or the other it’s about accepting we are both because we are ONE. sexuality is so screwed up in general with this world, it is not about orientation it’s about admitting to yourself that you are love and that is all that matters.
i wrote a book but your message spoke to me because yeah i used to have the same issues for awhile until i accepted that when in balance i am both masculine and feminine in retrospective because i have both currents. it’s not about distancing yourself from people not having a relationship because you feel these emotions or being androgynous/asexual, it’s about accepting that we are both and there are no differences between ANY of us. We are equals. We are love.